Rochester Magazine: What’s up with the guys on the New York Nationals [the Globetrotters regular opponent]? I mean come on. It seems like one of them gets his pants pulled down in every game, yet they’re always wearing embarrassing underpants.
LD: I don’t know about their underwear. I’m guessing they shop at bad places for their underwear.
RM: I’ve lost a lot of money on those guys over the years.
LD: That’s like Krusty the Clown in that Simpson’s episode. They ask him why he kept betting on the Washington Generals and he said “They were due, man. They were due.”
RM: Can you whistle “Sweet Georgia Brown”? LD: [whistling]. Man, you can never forget that tune. RM: Here’s me [whistling].
LD: Man, that is terrible. Don’t give up your day job. I mean, man, that’s really terrible.
RM: Sorry. I really don’t know how to whistle.
Donny Osmond, who was performing at the Mayo Civic Center in 2005.
RM: Do you accept the judges’ decision that you lost your boxing match with Danny Bonaduce [in a Chicago gym in 1994]? I talked to at least one person who said you won that fight.
RM: Are you still racing cars? I saw you win a celebrity Toyota race a few years back.
DO: Haven’t in a while. Did you know I won that race? Let’s see Bonaduce do that!
RM: Agree or disagree: You like romance novels about pirates.
TW: What do you mean, ‘Really’?
RM: I just thought you might.
TW: I don’t.
RM: OK, I’m going to give you one of the cheesy psych tests I give people. I’ll tell you what your answers represent later.
TW: I’m a little scared of this.
RM: Name your favorite animal and give me three words to describe it.
TW: My favorite animal is the Mastiff dog. It’s intimidating, large, and a loner.
RM: Same thing with your favorite color.
TW: Black. It’s neutral. It’s like Johnny Cash—the “Man in Black.” It’s a little scary.
RM: You’re in a white room. All alone. No windows or doors. How do you feel?
TW: Comfortable, sleepy, lonely.
RM: OK. The animal is supposed to represent how you feel about yourself. The color is how others perceive you. The white room is supposed to represent your feelings on death.
TW: Man, that’s pretty good. Those kind of fit.
RM: Kind of? Intimidating, large, a little scary … It’s probably a stretch, but I guess I can see that.
Wild Bill Bauer, a comedian who headlined at Goonie’s Comedy Club in 2009 (and died in 2012).
RM: Worst golf shot you’ve ever seen?
WBB: It was one of my own. I hooked a ball off the tee on the Burbank Golf Course. This was a great foursome, too. I was playing with Louie Anderson, Jeff Cesario, and Bill Kirchenbauer, who was on “Just The Ten Of Us” and “Coach.” I hooked it like 15 yards into a snake pit. I took the lost ball penalty. Louie said, ‘Aren’t you going to get that ball?’
RM: Speaking of Louie Anderson, is it true you once won his car in a poker game?
WBB: Yes. Now how did you find that out?
RM: I do my research.
WBB: I guess so. That’s a little known fact. Yes, I did. There was about $3,000 in the pot. It was way over everyone’s head. There were a few checks in there, including a bad check for $300 that I had just written. I would never have gone in like that without aces. I would have to have two aces and that’s what I pulled. He had kings.
RM: What kind of car was it?
WBB: It wasn’t new. It was a Cadillac that he had just bought. And I’ll say this about Louie Anderson, he would never welch on a debt. I didn’t want the car, but he made me take it.
Vicki Lawrence, from “The Carol Burnett Show” and “Mama’s Family,” who spoke at Power of the Purse in 2011.
RM: Best Vicki Lawrence song ever?
VL: Well, I only have the one.
RM: What? You have a bunch of songs.
VL: I only have one hit. “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia.”
RM: No. It’s “He Did With Me.”
VL: Oh no it’s not!
RM: What? That’s a good song.
VL: No. “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia” was my only hit.
RM: About that. So you killed your brother’s wife and her lover, but nothing ever happened to that Amos boy, Seth?
VL: I guess not. We need a diagram of the song plot. When I heard back in the early ‘80s that they were going to make a movie based on the song I said, this is hysterical, I have to be sure and watch. Because I’m not even sure what happened. I want to see what they think happened.
RM: My coworker didn’t believe you sang that. She thought it was Helen Reddy.
VL: Helen Reddy! That’s not even a good guess.